I guess I’ll have to settle for interviewing one of the characters. It may interest some of you to know that I start a book by writing all of the chapters for the main character. Then I pick another character and write all of their chapters. This helps me keep each individual plotline running smoothly and reduce the number of continuity mistakes.
Since I’m currently working with Robert I might as well interview him.
Randy: How are you enjoying the book so far?
Robert: You can’t be serious. I mean, have you read any of your books?
Randy: It isn’t as if I sit at home and read my books in utter admiration of my writing skills, but I do go through them several times as part of the editing process. What’s your point?
Robert: My point is that it stinks to be a protagonist in your novels. In the first book you beat me up and broke my ribs. In the second book you blew up the vehicle I was riding in and then shot me. I can only imagine what you plan to do to me in this story. It won’t be pleasant—of that I can be sure. I happened to run into the protagonist from your first book while we were waiting for you to get busy with another story. He told me that in one of the chapters you had him shot and then when he stumbled out to the street to save his granddaughter you ran over him with a van.
Randy: Point taken. Maybe that wasn’t a great question to start off the interview. Were there any scenes in the series so far that you liked?
Robert: I really enjoyed my date with Sierra at the Slab Factory.
Randy: That’s my favorite scene too. It’s one of only two scenes that made the transition from the original story to the one that was finally accepted by the publisher. At least I made sure the two of you stayed in touch. If you’re not happy with the way I’ve been treating you in the books, what do you suggest? What would you like to see happen?
Robert: Oh sure. I tell you and then you do the author equivalent of pulling my chair out from under me as I go to sit. No thank you.
Randy: I promise not to do that.
Robert: Your fingers are crossed.
Randy: Alright. This time I really promise not to use your answer against you.
Robert: Get rid of the plotting notes you’ve already made and turn book three into a romantic-comedy where Sierra and I are married at the end.
Randy: I like the way you think. The only problem with that idea is that I might start out writing a romantic-comedy, but by chapter four it would turn into a psychological thriller/horror story where Sierra turns out to be an insane assassin on the run from the FBI and ends up killing your entire family so she can have you all to herself.
Robert: There is something serious wrong with you.
Randy: I know.
Robert: What if you have Sierra and my family meet me at the airport when I get back home and we all travel to Camp Valiant and ride out the war in an austere, but safe setting?
Randy: It sounds great—really it does. I just don’t think that’s going to happen. It’s not a very exciting story and I have to keep the readers happy.
Robert: I’m starting to think you care about the readers more than you do me.
Randy: Oh my goodness. Where did the time go? That’s it for today. I’ll go ahead and put Robert back into the character box and get back to writing.
Robert: No! I don’t want to go. I . . . mmmphhh, mmpppph!